Inviting someone to have sex is much more hip read: consensual and gender-inclusive. Chris Donaghue, sex and intimacy expert at SKYN Condomsexplain the misogynistic undertones of the former, and how an invitation to sex is a consensual and pleasure-based approach to getting it on. Think: swinging a golf club, driving on the left side of the road, meeting your maybe-to-be parents-in-law. The best case scenario — be it pleasure, naked bodies, cuddles, or something else — is totally worth overcoming those feelings for. The same goes for where you are during said initiation. Make it personal As a general rule, the more personalized the come-on is, the better.
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The state of California passed a groundbreaking bill this week that redefines the standard of sexual consent from denial means no to yes means certainly. Did you do enough to avert your rape? Did you do a sufficient amount to confirm that she wanted it? Your present is not inadvertently raping someone! Just what you told Santa you wanted! And to those men I say: You guys! You are reading this all wrong! You a minute ago ask yourself: Did this person about, with their body language or their words, that they want to allow sex with me? If they did, go for it!