What goes on behind closed bedroom doors can vary from couple to couple, or even change between the same couple over time. Even further, your definition of a healthy sex life might not be exactly like your partner's. So how can you tell if the lack of sex is harmful to your relationship? Our views about sex are influenced by many factors, and it's hard to know what's normal when comparing your love life to those of your friends or the extravagant displays of passion we see in movies. There are several reasons you might find yourself in a sexless relationship. Some couples become less intimate over time, while others have less sex from the beginning. You may even wonder if you should leave—but if something has changed between you and your partner, there are many ways to revive the spark. The first step is taking a look at your relationship to understand why you're not having as much sex as you want.